Off the Grid and into Hill
by HyenaAA
Summary: New Arlen, a small replica of Rainey street is the last remaining settlement of mankind, following the great destruction. Hank Hill and his family and friends are forced to live life off the grid, scavenging and hunting for food and supplies, while still maintaining the Red blooded American Texan lifestyle, and no amount of zombies, raiders and assholes will stop them.
1. Chapter 1

King of the hill (OFF THE GRID)

Chapter 1. This is an introduction. The other chapters will probably not be this long. Cool.

The first beams of light shined through the old dusty window blinds, waking Hank Hill.

He opened his eyes and yawned, slowly awakening. His arms stretched out as he reached for his prescription glasses on the bedside dresser. Peggy let out an inaudible beside him. She did not find the invading beams of light as motivating, and shifted her body to avoid the light.

Hank glanced at her, then slipped his legs out of the bed and got to his feet. A dark stain on the brown wall across from him reminded him of natures attempt to push his family down. He glared at the mold for a second, before grabbing a pair of stained pajama pants and pulling them over his boxers. He left the bedroom and headed down the hall to the kitchen. He passed Bobby's room.

Bobby was sleeping on a military styled cot in a nearly empty room, save for a dresser and a gun rack holding up several rifles, ranging from high caliber hunting shotguns to fully automatic military grade assault rifles. The windows were barred with metal, making the room appear like the inside of a prison. But the bars were meant to keep intruders outside.

Hank headed to the kitchen. The refrigerator and stove were the only generator powered electrical appliance in the house. It let out a low hum as he opened the door and reached inside for a covered jar full of cold water mixed with ground up coffee.

"Thank God for Coffee" Hank said to himself with a slight smile.

He pulled out the jar and poured the coffee into another jar, using a strainer to catch the finer grains of coffee. He then poured it into a pot and left it on the stove to heat up. Enough coffee for the whole family. The time it would take to heat up gave Hank another time to deal with other matters. He grabbed his favorite book at the moment, a near mint condition copy of Willy Nelson's autobiography and headed outdoors to the outhouse.

A radioactive sunrise greeted him as he left the house. The sunlight illuminated the barren wasteland that surrounded New Arlen. Empty plains stretched as far as Hank could see. The only points of interest was the outhouse that stood at the back of his yard, and the fifteen foot barbed wired ditch that surrounded New Arlen's perimeter.

He hummed Willy Nelson's "Always on my mind" as he approached the outhouse.

Lady Bird, who had been resting on a dirty mattress beside the house, saw him, and came running towards him to greet him.

"Hey girl, did you sleep good?" Hank asked in a slightly higher pitched voice, bending over to scratch Lady Bird behind her ears.

She barked.

The effects from the apocalypse had created quite an effect on dogs. Lady Birds fur had mostly fallen off except for old patches, but Hank knew this would happen with old age, so he did not care. Her teeth become quite sharp from eating mostly raw meat. Her skin had become quite tough, and her legs had become quite muscular from having to hunt and sprint long distances. Hank loved her just the same, and in fact enjoyed these new changes. Lady Bird had become quite the companion for the Texan survivalist, and her hunting and tracking skills had only become more acute in the new environment.

"Come on ,Lady Bird, shake paws" Hank said cheerfully.

She barked, then sat and extended her paw.

"Good girl!" Hank said, shaking her paw. He looked around and picked up a large bone lying in the grass and tossed it away, "Go get it , girl!" he ordered, smiling.

Lady Bird barked, then ran after it. She put the bone between her two front paws and began chewing on it happily. The long bone was actually from an Emu's leg. They roamed in packs through out the wasteland, unaware of the destruction that had taken place. Although they were not native to Texas, the large amount of Emu's farms in the area had led to an outbreak in their numbers, especially after all the majority of the hunters had been incinerated or claimed by cancer following the nuclear fallout.

Hank reached the outhouse, admired his handiwork and opened the door. The hinge's creaked. "Guess I'll have to add that to the list" Hank grumbled, then stepped inside to do his morning business.

* * *

Peggy entered the kitchen, wearing an old and frayed bathrobe. She pulled out a frying pan from the pantry and set the stove top on low.

She smiled when she saw that Hank had already started heating up the coffee. Her smile disappeared when she saw they were out of butter.

"Guess I better add that to the grocery list" She said to herself, writing down "Butter" on a large list of items on the table. She returned to the fridge and pulled out an Emu egg, cracked it open and let the yolk spill out into the frying pan.

_Thank God for the Emu's _She thought to herself. Without them, New Arlen would have definitely died out long ago.

"Bobby! Breakfast in ten fifteen minutes!" She shouted. Bobby did not reply. The door opened and Hank stepped in.

"Hey Peg" Hank said smiling, taking a seat at the table.

"We're out of butter, grab some during the next scavenger hunt, please?" Peggy asked her husband.

Hank nodded, "We're all heading out today, I'm sure we'll find something."

"You boys be careful out there" Peggy said, "BOBBY! Breakfast in ten!".

Hank looked over the list of supplies. The bare necessities were all there, food, water, clothing (or any material to make clothes), ammunition, fuel. A few tools were added to the list , and any scrap metal or wood for Bill's shack. Hank had a list of personal items that was always running through his head, including old Texas relics, propane accessories, a new grill, Old records and guitar strings. These were not life essentials, but he would enjoy to have them.

He glanced over at the old grill outside. It was basically scrap metal, and any grill he found was in no better condition. It hurt his heart, though he never mentioned it, that he could not grill steaks anymore. He missed the backyard BBQ's, and he knew that one day they would have a new grill, even if he had to make it himself, and then they would have a big backyard BBQ, with all of New Arlen in attendance, and he would grill up the best grilled Emu breasts in the world overtop of propane fueled gas burners. Someday.

"Bobby! Breakfast in five! Get up!" Peggy shouted, not taking her eyes off the frying pan.

Bobby entered the kitchen, "Alright, mom, I'm up, whats the big idea?" He asked, rubbing his eyes.

The apocalypse had changed Bobby's appearance significantly. Gone was the chubby young boy growing up in a cozy suburban home. While he was still husky, his arms were more muscular, and his shoulder more broad. While he still kept his hair buzzed short, he had allowed a short two inch tall thick Mohawk to grow, giving him a tougher appearance. A stick and poke tattoo of a skull with an X on the forehead was on his upper arms. Underneath it, were six small lines, one for each kill. His pajama's were very old, and had become torn in multiple places and discolored, but this did not bother Bobby.

"Time for breakfast, son" Hank said. While he did not approve of Bobby's image, he was very pleased with how well his son had coped with the complete and utter destruction of society, and liked that his son had developed muscles.

"Alright, what're we having?" Bobby asked. His voice still had a bit of squeal in it.

"Emu omelette" Peggy said, reaching into the cupboard and pulling out three cracked old plates.

"Again? Oh... great... yeah" Bobby said disappointingly.

"You better show some appreciation, your mothers whats keeping this family afloat" Hank said firmly.

"Right... thanks, mom" Bobby said with a slight hint of sarcasm, accepting the plate of Emu omelette.

Hank sighed and looked up at Peggy. She sighed, then handed Hank his plate and sat down herself.

"So what's going on today?" Bobby asked, poking his omelette with an old fork.

"Going scavenging" Hank replied.

Bobby's face lit up, "Can I come!? Last time Joseph went, he brought back this crazy sniper rifle! Please Dad! Can I come!?"

Hank shook his head, "No, we need you here on watch-" "But..." "-Joseph's isn't coming either this time" (_Because he's way too out of control_ Hank thought to himself), "I'll be out all day, and we're going out tomorrow too. Now don't give me that look, we need you two on watch" Hank said firmly.

"Fine, watch sucks though" Bobby said, looking down at his plate.

"Watch duty is very important! Just remember the service you're doing for the community!" Hank said.

Bobby sighed.

"Do you really think you need to go out today and tomorrow? You're not staying out overnight?" Peggy asked with concern.

Hank shook his head, "Nah, we'll be back by evening."

Peggy smiled, "Alright, be careful out there". They finished there breakfast.

* * *

Hank left his home and walked down New Arlen, getting the old gang together. New Arlen was not very big. It was about the same length as Rainey street, and the only buildings were the homes of the residents. With Hanks carpentry skills, they had managed to rebuilt most of the homes, but they were always on the look out for supplies in the ruins of old Texas. He walked down the dirt road, going from home to home and rallying the men.

The first home was the Gribble residence. Hank knocked once, before the door opened. A native teenager opened. Josephs image had also changed ever since the breakdown of society. He had always been muscular before hand, but his hair had grown out much more wildly, similar to John Redcorn. He was only wearing shorts, revealing his bare chest that was covered in first nations tribal tattoos, that ran up and down his arms and on the sides of his face. John Redcorn provided the tattoo's, and Dale approved of it. After seeing the first tattoo, A large hawk with its wings spread across Joseph's back, he said "Jesus, John Redcorn, these are badass! Can I get some!?" which lead to Joseph eventually covering the majority of his body in tribal tattoos.

"Hey Hank" He said, "Dad's just about ready"

"Alright, just tell him i'm here" Hank said. He found it uncomfortable being around any man who wasn't wearing a shirt, let alone his best friends son.

Joseph nodded, but didn't move. Hank looked up at the sky for a moment. A cloud was lazily drifting across the sky.

"Uh... you can just go tell him i'm here... right now" Hank said.

"Oh, alright" Joseph said, then walked away. The Gribble home also had mold stains on the wall. It was nearly impossible to prevent. Unlike Hanks home, the outer walls of the gribble home was just reinforced plywood. Dale did not care as much about having a pretty home, now that 99% of the population was incinerated, zombiefied, or dying of cancer.

Dale walked into the room, "Hey Hank!" He said. He was a balding skinny man, with awkward tribal tattoos going up his forearms. Hank cringed a little when he saw them. They did not look good on Dale, but no one had the heart to tell him. Dale grabbed his hat and sunglasses off a hook, "Keep an eye out for smokes, I only got enough for three months" Dale said.

"Sure thing Dale." Hank said.

Dale pulled out a cigarette and brought it to his lips. He was about to light it when Nancy shouted, "Dale! No smoking in the house, we got enough damage as it is!"

"If this place can survive after the apocalypse, i'm sure it can survive smelling like smokes!" Dale shouted back.

"No smoking in the house, Dale!" Nancy shouted.

Dale sighed, then stepped outside the house before lighting his smoke.

"Thanks sug!" Nancy shouted.

"Women..." Dale said, shaking his head, "Alright, you get Bill and Boomhauer, I'll get the radiation suits and guns" He said. Hank nodded.

Boomhauer was sitting on a rocking chair on the sheet of plywood that counted as a front porch. His house was in the same condition as Dales. The rusty remains of his Chevrolet 1970's Camaro was rusting in front of his house on the lawn. It had somehow functioned enough to get from Rainey street to the middle of nowhere, before breaking down a week after they 'settled' New Arlen.

"Yo" He said, looking up at Hank.

"It's time" Hank said.

Boomhauer nodded. He reached over and picked up a rifle leaning against his wall and strapped on an ammunition belt. Hank continued down the street to Bill's shack.

He passed Luanna's and Lucky's trailer. Lawn ornaments and broken garden gnomes littered there yard. Hank could hear them arguing through a broken window in the trailer.

"Lucky! We need more eggs! We're running out of food!" Luanna shouted.

"Don't worry baby girl, we'll just talk to Hank" Lucky said back.

"I don't like borrowing from everyone! I can't handle this! I just wish things could go back!" Luanna cried out.

"We can't do that no more , baby girl, but we're doing fine!" Lucky tried to calm her down.

"NO! I can't handle this... I can't live like the others! I want food... and electricity! and to look pretty!" Luanne began to cry.

"Don't worry Baby girl, you'll always be pretty to me!" Lucky replied.

"That's not enough!" Luanne was crying.

"Baby girl, you're the most beautiful girl in the wasteland, no joke" Lucky said. Hank could see them embrace inside the dark trailer.

"Hows this, I'll go out scavenging today, and I'll get you some old makeup, and a new dress, and we'll look like one of them old timey couples!" Lucky suggested.

Luanne cried a little more, before managing to get out "I would like that."

_Oh no, Lucky isn't coming with us..._ Hank thought, but was interrupted when the trailer door swung open and Lucky came running out. "Hank! I need a favor to ask you, as you're son in law... and as a good friend, I would like to come scavenging today, to help the community" Lucky said.

Hank opened his mouth to argue, but Lucky kept talking, "I know you've got to be quiet out there, and I know what not to do, I heard what happened when you brought Joseph out! And I want to come! I even got my own guns and rad suit!"

Hank wanted to argue, but thought better of it. "Alright, you can come along, but you'll be sitting in the back"

Lucky smiled, "That would be nice"

If Lucky was with them, there would be no way for Joseph to come along. The two of them headed towards Bills shack, which was the last home on this side of New Arlen, with only the wasteland stretched out in the distance.

Hank knocked on the door. It opened, releasing a pungent smell. Bill stood in the doorway, looking the same as always, overweight and wearing dirty clothes. The only difference was slightly more muscle, a do rag of the american flag on his head, and a couple tattoos. On one arm, a nuclear bomb falling from the sky, and the other was a poorly drawn image of his ex-wife's face, and her name, _Lenore_ under her face. Bill had found out that she did not survive the Apocalypse, which on one hand made him feel terrible, but also brought feelings of closure, knowing that now he could never get back together with the women, who despite ruining his life, he still felt feelings for.

"Bill, we're heading out, you ready?" Hank asked.

Bill nodded, "Lets get it done, lemme get my stuff" He went back into the shack, which was nearly pitch black compared to the lighting from outdoors.

"You can come sit inside, if you want" Bill offered. Lucky looked at Hank, who shook his head, "No Bill, we can wait outside, I wouldn't want to bother you" He said.

"No, it's fine, come on in!" Bill said warmly, looking through belongings.

"No, we have to be going pretty fast" Hank said. Lucky stepped away from the doorway, unable to handle the smells coming from the shack, despite his redneck upbringing. Hank had more tolerance, but even he had his limits. He could see that mold dominated the inside of the shack walls.

Eventually Bill came out, wearing an old ragged army jacket with an American flag sewn onto the back. He had a belt of ammunition and a rifle strapped over his shoulder.

"Alright, let's go" He said, closing the door behind him, but the smell of his shack still lingered.

The trio walked back to Hanks house.

"Lucky here coming scavenging?" Bill asked.

"Yep" Lucky replied.

"Not worried about leaving behind Luanne?" Bill asked.

"She can look out for herself, but I want to get her something special from the ruins" Lucky said.

"Must be nice, living with a woman... all together... nice and cozy" Bill said, with a slight whimper in his voice.

"Alright, lets stop talking and focus on the task at hand!" Hank said, cutting off the conversation.

Bill and Boomhauer were already suiting up in there radiation suits beside Hanks red pick up truck. The truck had also changed following the apocalypse. The only vehicles that remained in New Arlen was Hanks Truck, Dale's dead bug Van, and Kahn's SUV. Each vehicle had been upgraded, and Hanks truck was no exception. The sides had become armor platted, with spikes and barbed wire running along it. The windows had been bared with iron beams, and a large machine gun had been welded onto the back. During one scavenge, Hank found a top quality suspension, and spent a day installing it, adding the finishing touches to his ultimate survivalist truck. His only disappointment was that he could not wash his truck as often as he liked, due to water being a precious commodity, so the sides and front were coated in a fine mixture of dirt, mud and dried blood.

"Alright boys, we're going out for a long run, but we're going to jam tonight when we get back, so lets all make it back!" Hank said.

Peggy snuck up behind Hank and kissed him on the cheek.

"Peggy!" Hank shouted, embarrassed. Dale, Lucky and Boomhauer laughed. Bill looked away uncomfortably.

"Stay safe , Hank" She said, smiling , before walking away.

Hank stood silently for a moment, but was interrupted when Lady Bird ran up to him barking.

"Alright girl, you coming with us? Awh, whose a good girl!" Hank said, scratching her behind her ears.

"That dog don't look right" Dale said.

"Shut up, Dale" Hank said. He pulled down the back latch of the pickup truck. Lady Bird jumped in, followed by Dale and Lucky.

"Boomhauer, you're riding shot gun, Bill get in the back middle."

"Yo" Boomhauer acknowledged.

Hank closed the back hatch and climbed into the drivers seat. Fuel was three quarters full. Dale took his position at the machine gun, making sure it wasn't rusting or jammed. "All good back here!" He shouted, knocking twice on the top of the truck roof.

Lady Bird barked.

"Alright, let's go!" Hank said, switching the keys into ignition. The truck engine roared to life, and they drove off down the dirt road.

"Be careful, rednecks!" Kahn shouted from in front of his house. Kahn's home was nearly as pretty as Hanks. The challenge for having the most beautiful home that most American's living in the suburbs participated in now only consisted of a never ending battle between Hank and Kahn to have the nicest looking lawn, which in this case meant having a barren yard devoid of grass and garbage.

"Don't get eating alive!" Kahn added, laughing.

They drove past the very last home of New Arlen, two old trailers owned by John Redcorn. One was used for living in, while enough housed a grow op. John Redcorn was the only source of marijuana in New Arlen, something Hank did not approve of, but everyone else took full advantage of.

John Redcorn stood in front of his trailer, and put his hand up as the truck drove by, wordlessly wishing them good luck. A slight breeze, a rare thing in the wasteland, blew across the town, making John Redcorns hair dance in the wind for a moment.

They drove by, past a flag pole waving Old Glory, and across the small wooden bridge that was built over top the protective ditch, and into the wasteland.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

The sun was up in the sky, baring down on the lone truck as it drove through empty plains and ravaged roads. The heat was a killer, and dehydration was a huge problem. The five men only wore the pants of their makeshift radiation suits. A geiger counter on the dashboard was there warning, so they knew where there was safety. In the initial scavenger hunts, they would always wear the suits, but they would trap heat and most surely kill them from exhaustion. Even LAdy bird had her own doggy suit, handmade by Hank.

She lay down in the back of the truck, attempting to get close to some shade, but ultimately failing. Lucky sat beside her, the heat preventing him from doing anything productive. It was too hot to even tell Dale to shut up about conspiracy theories.

"You see, what happened was, the Chinese and the Russians had made a secret alliance, but Rasputin dropped the ball, leading to a civil war fought between jets over top of Tibet, which really belonged to Afghanistan. See, most people say Tibet was under control of the Chinese, but they had actually sold off Tibet when the Uranium deposits ran out, see, and then Uncle Sams gotta get his fingers wet in the big pie of Tibets Uranium triangle, and Blam-O , you got you're ultimate nuclear holocaust."

Dale looked at Lucky, waiting for a reply.

Lucky had nothing to say, so he wiped the sweat of his forehead and flicked it away.

"You know, this is why I liked bringing Joseph along. He could add something interesting to the conversation. You just kind of sit." Dale narrowed his eyes at him, "You make me sick" he said quietly, before lighting up a cigarette.

Lucky merely sighed and looked away. Lady Bird let out a low whimper.

On the inside of the truck, Hank scanned the horizon, looking for signs of civilization.

"You know, it's kind of funny..." Bill began from the backseat, "Before now, I had a home and property, and women wouldn't touch me. But now having a shack is like being a millionaire, but all the women are dead!" Bill let out a forced laugh.

"Yeah... yeah, you said it, Bill" Hank said uncomfortably, not looking at him.

"Yeah, you know? What do you think Boomhauer? What's going to happen to us bachelors? We're the only single men in New Arlen, I bet you're missing all the tail you're used to!" Bill said.

"Yo man, new concerns, women come and go... they'll still come and go when they see you, they smell that shack, WHEW!" Boomhauer said, looking back at Bill. Bill looked upset. "Yo ,man, no disrespect, but women, there out there, don't you worry" Boomahuer added, trying to cheer Bill up.

Bill smiled weakly. Boomhauer went back to scanning the countryside.

"Look ahead, ruins" Hank said, pointing to a few crumbling skyscrapers in the distance.

Dale knocked on the top of the truck three times. Then the sound of gunfire rang out for a couple seconds. Dale looked around and saw the target. One zombie, about thirty yards away dropped to the ground.

"Yo man, Dale got it" Boomhauer said.

In the pick up, Dale laughed, "Ha! Blam-O! One shot, one kill!" He cheered again, pointing at the downed zombie.

"Nice shot" Lucky said.

"You better believe it" Dale replied, taking a drag of his cigarette and exhaling in a satisfied fashion. The zombie, now broken on the ground, had been one Carl Moss, the principal of Tom Landry Middle School.

* * *

"Bobby, don't go wandering off this time, you're on watch duty till I call you for lunch!" Peggy shouted. Bobby ignored her, heading over to Josephs house.

"Hey Joseph, Dad says I got to do watch duty, you want in?" Bobby asked.

Joseph nodded, "Yeah man, there's nothing to do anyways" He snickered, then showed Bobby a baggie of marijuana.

Bobby looked at it for a moment, "Dad says I can't smoke while on watch." He said it with disappointment in his voice.

"No , man,this is different. John Redcorn said it will help get your spirits in order, give us leadership visions" Joseph argued.

"Well, ca't argue with that, Dad's always going on about how to be a good leader!" Bobby said, laughing.

"Lets get to it then" Joseph said. The two friends headed towards the watch tower, a tree house built around a tall dead Oak tree across the street from Hank's house. The tree was the only one standing in New Arlen, and was in a perfect position to watch for intruders from any direction, or to get stoned.

"Hey guys" Connie was waiting for them by the tree.

"Hey Connie!" Bobby said happily.

"Dad says I should be cleaning the backyard, but it's already done, what are you two up to?" She asked.

"Getting stoned at the perch" Joseph said. The perch was the platform at the top of the tree.

"Cool, can I come?" She asked.

"Yeah, come on up" Bobby said invitingly.

She smiled, but it was not completely true. She didn't know how she felt about Bobby anymore. His new appearance did not fit his personality anymore. He wasn't the funny husky boy she knew in school. He had changed, as they all had. The responsibilities of survival had changed all of them. She was no longer the straight A student with a bright future and higher education waiting for her. Those dreams had burnt out with the firestorms that destroyed all the great universities and libraries of the old world. Now she was the town doctor, as she had the most knowledge of medicine. She was possibly the most educated person in New Arlen, maybe even smarter than Peggy Hill, who claimed to have the highest IQ but often quoted incorrect facts. Connie was the one who people came to when they had cuts and bruises. Connie was who they came to for knowledge on how to build radiation suits. Connie was the one called upon when random medications were brought in from the scavengers. She was scared that when Luanna got pregnant, she would be called upon to deliver the baby. These thoughts scared her, but she didn't dwell on them often. Her importance did not match her outward appearance. She wore a simple patched dress that was coated with dirt and dust. She did not wear makeup or try to do up her hair, despite Luanne's insistence.

The trio of friends reached the perch. From atop the old oak tree, they could see for miles, but this was boring. They preferred to watch the people of New Arlen go about their business. Occasionally, a zombie would be seen in the distance, but this was rare, and Bobby would never miss. Each kill was a new mark on his arm. The only other shooter who could compare with Bobby was Connie's mother, Minh.

"Hey look, Luanne's trying to clean up her yard again" Bobby said. Luanne was awkwardly trying to carry three broken garden gnomes at once, but dropped them all, kicked one, hurt her foot, then screamed and stormed back into the trailer.

"She hasn't quite adapted yet" Connie said awkwardly.

Bobby and Joseph nodded.

"Hey look, my mom's headed to John Redcorns trailer again. I guess we're low on dope" Joseph said. Connie and Bobby looked at each other nervously. Even after the apocalypse, Joseph and Dale remained unaware of Nancy's affair with John Redcorn.

"She sure see's him a lot" Joseph said absentmindedly, "Hey look, Kahn's leaving garbage on your lawn again."

Bobby looked down at his yard and saw that Kahn was, indeed, leaving small mechanical parts, probably busted screws and nails, all across Hank's yard.

"Somethings never change" Connie said.

"Enough watching, let's blaze!" Bobbie suggested happily. Joseph laughed and pulled out a joint.

* * *

"Nancy you came" John Redcorn said, not looking at her as she came near, but staring off into the wasteland.

"I know... I can't bear being alone in that house all day" She said quietly. She moved beside him and slid his arm over her shoulder. His trailer had dream catchers and wind chimes hanging from the cover.

"We're outdoors! Joseph could see us!" John Redcorn said sternly.

"Then let's move inside" Nancy said suggestively. John Redcorn smiled, and opened the door to his trailer, allowing her inside.

* * *

"There they go at it again, even after going through Hell and back" Peggy said, looking out the window at John Redcorns trailer.

"They always going at it, no surprise" Minh said.

"Yes , well, I guess there isn't much else to do" Peggy said, looking away from the trailer. Minh was sitting in the Hill's living room on an old dilapidated couch, while Peggy looked out the window.

"Oooo, PEggy Hill, Hank been trying something new?" Minh asked excitedly.

Peggy sighed, "No, Same old same old, even less than before. You would think he would be more excited, but ... oh , I don't know" Peggy looked back out the window.

"Crap, Kahn's leaving junk on the lawn again, can't you get him to stop?" Peggy asked Minh.

Minh sighed. She walked over to the window and shouted "KAHN! STOP LEAVING TRASH ON HILL LAWN! THERE'S A WINDOW RIGHT HERE!"

"I NO LEAVING TRASH! I'M MAKING IT LOOK NICER, LEAVING PRESENTS FOR HANK!" Kahn shouted back.

"FOR GOD'S SAKE KAHN, I'M RIGHT HERE, STOP LEAVING TRASH ON MY LAWN!" Peggy shouted.

Kahn shouted something back in Laotian, leading to a big argument between Kahn and Minh. Eventually Minh slammed the window shut, with a look of disgust and anger on her face.

"Some things never change" Bobby said, watching Kahn stomp back to his house.

"I'm so tired of them fighting, I wish they would just stop!" Connie said angrily.

"Here, this'll help" Joseph said, handing her the joint.

"Zombie, 7 O'clock!" Bobby said. He looked through his scope, and took the shot. A thousand yards away, a zombified Dooley, one of the bullies at Bobby's old school, dropped to the ground a moment after its head exploded, splattering blood, brain matter and skull fragments across the wasteland.

"That's seven" Bobby said, smirking.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The truck slowed down as it drove through the twisted and bombed out remains of whatever Texas city had stood. Shadows, permanently burned onto the walls, gave a disturbing realization that was always felt when driving through the ruins. There was no way to tell who any of these poor souls had been before the blast, but now they were all identical, placed upon the still standing walls of reinforced structures like tattoos.

"Keep your eyes peeled for zombies, there's no telling how many could be lurking in the shadows" Hank said. He kept the truck at a good pace, in case any sprinters attempted an attack.

"I wonder how many of these people were happy before they were cut down..." Bill began.

"Don't think about that right now, Bill" Hank ordered.

Bill went silent.

"Yo man, megalo mart down the street, right there" Boomhauer pointed down a street. Hank turned the truck , but soon realized it was a dud as they got closer. The roof had caved in on one side. The glass was smashed and a few cars had crashed straight through the wall.

The truck slowed to a stop in the parking lot. They climbed out and looked at the ruins of the megalo mart. Hank felt the distinct feeling of being watched. He switched off the safety on his rifle, just in case. Bill and Boomhauer did the same. Dale kept the machine gun focused on the none caved in entrance to the megalo mart.

"You sure about this, I get the creeps just looking at it" Lucky said.

"Just stay put, hold onto Lady Bird" Hank ordered. He knew Lucky would only draw attention, "Dale, keep the gun focused on the front, cover us."

"Can do" Dale said, waving Hank a salute.

Hank nodded to Bill and Boomhauer. They all crept forward together at a cautious pace, rifles raised.

"Yo man, too dangerous" Boomhauer mumbled.

Hank agreed, but a megalomart was a rare find. They passed by flipped over and crashed cars. Behind him, Lady Bird barked.

"Hank, this isn't a good idea" Bill said.

Hank ignored him, but his steps got slower and slower. The entrance was only twelve feet away, but if felt like a hundred miles.

Lady Bird continued to bark. The inside of the Megalo mart was pretty dark from what they could see, with a few beams of light penetrating the ceiling.

"Oh shit man, yo, check this out" Boomhauer said, waving them over. He pointed to the inside of a car, which had a dead body in it, smashed agaisnt the windshield, but held back by a seat belt. The injuries were so severe that even the gender of the corpse was unknowable.

"Jesus, Boomhauer!, we didn't need to see that!" Hank said, looking away.

Bill turned away and threw up a little.

"No man, bite marks!" Boomhauer said, pointing at bite marks all along one side of the body.

"Bite marks..?" Hank asked nervously. He sidestepped along the car, then looked away and threw up on the ground, "Oh god!"

Boomhauer looked around and his face turned green. About ten corpses lay along the ground, each one too critically damaged to reanimate, but enough for zombies to feast on.

There was a loud noise from inside the megalomart mart, and as if on cue, a dozen zombies charged from the entrance towards the three survivalists.

"Shit! RUN!" Hank shouted , fleeing back to the truck, with Bill and Boomhauer in tow.

The zombies spat and hissed as they charged after them, with even more coming out. A couple sprinters in the front quickly closed in on the trio.

Bill spun around just as its outstretched arms grabbed him. His shotgun blasted a hole straight through its stomach, sending it flying back. Another blast from the gun lifted the other zombie off the ground, decapitating it with the force of the bullet. A moment later, the air was filled with the sounds of the machine gun, cutting down the zombies like a million tiny saws.

"BILL! LET'S GO!" Hank screamed, his voice barely audible over the machine gun and Lady Birds barking.

Bill ran back to the truck and hopped into the back as Hank hit the gas and sped off from the parking lot. Dale lost his balance and fell back into the pick up. Lady Bird was struggling against Lucky, excited by the zombies and the machine gun fire. Dale had to join in resisting her as the truck sped down the road. Hundred's of zombies had come charging from all directions as they sped down the road.

"DALE! GET ON THE GUN!" Hank shouted. Up ahead, a couple dozen zombies had formed a human blockade. If the truck got caught up in them, they were toast. Dale let go off Ladybird and grabbed the handles of the machine gun, opening fire. Blood splatters as the crowd fell, before the pickup truck smashed through them with ease.

"We have to get out of here!" Bill cried out from the back. He was covered in zombie blood, and was attempting to slick it off.

"Yo man! Watch out!" Boomhauer shouted. He unrolled the window, pulled out a pistol, and attempted to shoot through the metal bars, but rarely hit a target.

"Boomhauer! You're wasting ammo, conserve it until we get in real trouble!" Hank said, just before doing an incredibly sharp turn and accelerating down a side road. The tires squealed under the force. Dale was nearly thrown over the edge, but kept his hold on the machine gun, saving his life. Lucky reached for him and helped pull him back into the pickup. Lady Bird continued to bark and try to shake loose of Lucky's hold.

"Jesus Hank! You trying to kill me!" Dale shouted, but Hank did not hear him, he was too focused on escaping the zombie horde.

They sped through the ruins of an old suburb , where the zombie concentration was less. Zombified suburban housewifes and lawyers hissed at them from inside the houses, but could not do anything more.

Eventually they were out of the zombie proximity, but adrenaline kept Hank going. Besides, he didn't like this neighborhood. The houses were all two floor duplexes, and it felt pretentious.

"We can;t come back to this city, it's not safe" Hank said.

"Agreed" Boomhauer and Bill said.

Eventually they reached a freeway, and headed to the next town.

* * *

"Bobby! Time for lunch!" Peggy called up from the bottom of Oak tree.

"Alright, lunch! I was getting the munchies!" Bobby said to Joseph and Connie. Joseph giggled.

"But Bobby, she'll see you're stoned!" Connie said.

"Oh no!... wait, I got a plan... I'll bring lunch up here!" Bobby looked down at his mom.

"Hey... uh... mom, JOseph and Connie are up here, and they're hungry too... and this jobs too important... can you just leave us food and I'll come get it?!" Bobby called out. Joseph and Connie laughed some more, "Guys, shut up, shhh, she'll hear you!" Bobby said, shushing them, but his face was red with laughter.

"Alright dear, I'll bring some more, you boys just stay up there!" Peggy replied.

"Alright!" Joseph said, giving Bobby a high five.

Peggy returned to the Hill residence. Minh was still sitting on the couch, looking out the window towards John Redcorn's trailer.

"Why you bring that boy lunch? He big enough to come get it himself!" Minh said.

"Now Minh, you know he's working hard up there" Peggy called out from the kitchen.

"More like working stoned" Minh said under her breathe.

Peggy returned with a plate full of Emu meat sandwiches, and a few bottles of water.

"I'll be right back" She said.

Minh smiled cheerily at Peggy, but then dropped it as soon as she was outside. She looked out the window towards John Redcorns trailer. She felt a little jealous of Nancy for getting John Redcorn all to herself. She wished Kahn had become more dominant after the apocalypse, but he seemed to become even more materialistic, focusing more of his energy on being better then Hank. Maybe this was his way of coping with the new realities of the world. Or maybe he was just stuck living in the past.

Peggy returned to the living room, "Now where were we?" She asked.

"Right about here" Minh said, pulling out a joint.

Peggy smiled.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The red pick up truck drove through a small working class town. The five men scanned the town for any sign of movement. The last encounter had been way too close for any of them, and they were determined to avoid such a close encounter again.

Bill had peed his pants a little.

The geiger counter on the dash would occasionally click a little, but not enough to cause alarm.

Dale banged on the roof twice, "Hank! There's a safe, I see one!" Dale shouted from the pick up.

Hank slowed the truck to a stop.

"Where? You sure?" Hank asked out the window.

"Sure of it, This place should be a big one!" Dale said. He pointed at a pizza joint named "Al's discount Pizza".

"Seriously? It doesn't look very promising" Hank said.

"No way, this guy always posts pictures online of his stash" Dale said. He climbed out of the pick up. Hank sighed, then looked at Bill and Boomhauer.

They shrugged.

"Alright, everyone out" Hank said. The five men and the dog climbed out of the truck and stood in front of "Al's discount pizza".

"Now, are you sure this is a safe house?" Hank asked.

Dale laughed, "Hank, I know my safe houses, and this is definitely one. Al was obsessed with the idea of fitting in, but I don't think he ever assumed the bombs would fall. He's the kind of guy who wouldn't even lock his safe" Dale laughed, then tossed aside a cigarette butt, and pushed the door open.

"Yo man, be careful" Boomhauer said, scanning the surrounding buildings, but there were no zombies around.

"Relax, Boomhauer, zombies would have come running when they heard the truck. We'll be out of here in no time." Dale went behind the desk and moved a mat, "Looks like I found it!" Bill followed Dale to look at the safe.

"How does he know this is a safe house? What the hell is he talking about?" Lucky asked Hank.

"Dale joined some internet group a few years ago that talked about preparing for the doom day and what not. He memorized all there places or something, I guess" Hank said.

"Didn't memorise, learnt!" Dale shouted back, "Doomsday Preppers, they're a godsend!"

"So why did you join the site?" Lucky asked, taking a look at the safe. He was surprised to see that it was just a hatch on the ground.

"Doesn't hurt to be prepared, my friend. This is the fourth safe I've found in Texas. A lot of the people on the site posted pictures of their homes and how they defended it. I just memorized all of it, never put up anything about my place just to be safe. Looks like I'm getting the last laugh!" Dale let out a laugh, then lit a cigarette and took a quick drag.

"Alright, Bill, get this safe opened up" He ordered.

Bill nodded and bend over, grabbing the handles to the safe. He pulled. To everyone's surprise except Dale, the safe opened up, revealing a ladder into a bomb shelter. Lady Bird growled at the open hole.

"See? Old Bastard didn't really expect the apocalypse" Dale said, sliding down the ladder.

He let out a scream from down below , followed by a gunshot. Lady Bird barked.

"Dale! You alright!?" Hank pushed Lucky out of the way and slid down the ladder.

Dale was standing with his pistol out, pointing it at a dead man in a pizza outfit lying on the ground, a bullet through his head.

"Jesus, did he zombie out in the safe?" Hank asked.

"uh... yeah... he came right at me to bite me!" Dale said unconvincingly, "Holy, look at all the supplies!"

Hank gasped at all the supplies. Stacks of canned and dried foods. Hundreds of sheets of toilet paper. Multiple medicines. First Aid kits. Clothes. Batteries. And best of all, a flat of Alamo Beer!

Bill and Boomhauer slid down behind Hank. They both gasped, looking at all the supplies available. Lucky was the last to slide down.

"Damn, look at all this ... damn" He said, pilfering through the supplies.

"This could take several loads, lets load up with as much as we can. We won't need to search anywhere else for a long time, this place is perfect!" Hank said.

Lucky let out a little cheer. They all looked at him. He showed them a large makeup kit, "Luanne's going to love this!" He said.

Bill opened up a freezer at one end, full of frozen meat. He pulled out a box of ribs, "I'll be making Dauterive styled ribs tonight!" He said.

"Alright!" Dale said happily.

Above them, Lady Bird whined.

"Alright, start loading up. We'l come back here tomorrow and stock up again. But we got to conserve. These supplies could last us a lifetime!" Hank said happily. They began taking essentials and carrying them up to the truck, loading it to maximum capacity.

Half an hour later they were driving down the freeway, singing a country song together. Normally Hank wouldn't sing Capella, but this was a special time, and life was good. Not even the burnt shadows and ruins of homes could dampen their spirits.

Then they heard gun fire and shouting.

"What's that?" Bill asked.

Hank shook his head, "No idea."

The source of the noise revealed itself. Down the street, at a small two story building with boarded up windows, the front door burst open and a man in a bloody shirt ran out, screaming for help. Three zombies charged out after him.

"HELP ME!" He screamed towards the oncoming truck.

"Jesus!" Hank hit the brakes, grabbed his gun, pushed open the front door and jumped out. He took aim and shot, but missed. The zombie closest to the man grab his shoulder and pulled him to the ground. He tried to get up but the other two jumped down on him. He screamed. Bullets shot through the air as the zombies on top of him bit into his flesh, ignoring the guns. Lady Bird jumped from the back of the truck and charged forward ("LADYBIRD! NO!") and jumped into the three zombies. She bit into on of them and pulled it off the man. The other two changed there attention to the dog. They jumped at her, but she retreated back. They tried to chase after her, but a quick burst from the machine gun removed both their heads and upper torsos.

"LADY BIRD! HERE, NOW!" Hank ordered. Lady Bird ran over to him. The zombie she had pulled to the ground got to its feet, but was quickly gunned down.

"INTO THE BACK, NOW!" Hank ordered, pointing at the pick up. Lady Bird whined for a second, but Hank's glare made her stop, and she ran back into the back of the truck. Several more zombies charged through the open door, but were reduced to mince meat by Dale's machine gun. Bill and Boomhauer began towards the man, who was getting to his feet.

"Bill! Boomhauer! Get back, he's bitten!" Hank ordered. They stopped dead i their tracks, then aimed their rifles at the man.

"Please! Don't shoot! Oh God, please!" He cried out pleading them. The zombies had bit into shoulders, arms, and ribs. They infected through biting, and this man was infected for sure.

"Step back, don't come towards!" Hank said.

"I'll take him down" Dale said, aiming the machine gun.

"No, just wait" Hank said, "Who are you?" He asked.

"My names Pat... Pat Alphonso! Please... my friends... and family! They're being ripped apart, you have to help me!" He said pointing to the boarded up building.

Hank shook his head, "We can't, its' too dangerous" Hank looked at the others. Dale was expressionless with his sunglasses on. Lucky looked like he agreed with Hank. Dale was looking at the man with fear, but Bill looked like he wanted to help.

"Please... you got to believe me! They'll still alive... they have to be! They were right behind me!" Pat looked back.

"Oh shit..." He said quietly.

"I'm sorry" Hank said.

Pat looked back at them "Oh God... no... not like this..."

Hank heard hissing from inside the building. More zombies would be coming out any minute.

"Please... get out of here. I'm... i'm infected... but it's fine, everything I live for was inside that home." Pat looked back inside the building. He picked up a metal pipe that was lying on the ground, "I'm going to kill them" he said.

"This guy's nuts" Dale whispered to Lucky. Lucky nodded.

"Wait, before you go. You have to be careful, there's a group out there, they're brutal. They've got some sort of device that attracts zombies! They send out scouts who pretend to be lonely wanderers ... and they draw the hordes out, then come in later to clean up and take people's stuff! Please, don't let it happen to you" Pat said, before taking a deep breathe, and charging towards the boarded up building. A second later, several zombies charged out. Hank and his friends watched in horror as Pat lifted the pipe to smash the first zombie, but was instantly tackled to the ground and ripped apart.

Dale opened fire with the machine gun. The thunder of the gun brought Hank back to reality. Dale did not stop shooting, even after the zombies and Pat's remains were reduced to a splatter of guts, until the truck sped off in the opposite direction, returning to New Arlen.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Bobby saw the red truck off in the distance first. The sun was beginning to set, making visibility tricky. He followed it for a bit with his rifle scope.

"There back" He said to Joseph and Connie. Joseph had been sharpening a stick with his hunting knife, too bored to do anything else. Connie had gone home quickly to grab a book to read. They both looked up at him.

"Thank god, we can finally get off here." Joseph said.

Bobby nodded. He ringed the bell on the perch, alerting New Arlen.

"Scavengers are back! They're back!" He shouted.

Joseph descended the ladder first, followed by Connie.

"Aren't you coming?" She asked.

"In a minute" Bobby said. She shrugged, then climbed down the ladder. Bobby liked watching everyone gather when the scavengers came back. He watched Luanne leave her trailer, kicking bits of garbage out of the way. Minh and Kahn met Connie in the center of town. Kahn scolded her for not cleaning the backyard, but she ignored him. He watched Peggy walk across the lawn, wearing the cleanest clothing she owned, as if to impress Hank. Nancy left John Redcorns trailer first, then John Redcorn came out a few minutes later. Bobby stretched for a moment, then climbed down the ladder himself.

The red truck crossed the little bridge, then stopped. Lucky and Dale climbed off the pick up and pulled the bridge back, making the ditch full circle and making New Arlen impenetrable from zombies.

The truck stopped in front of Hanks house.

He climbed out happily.

"Well, what you rednecks find?" Kahn asked, expecting disappointment.

"Oh, you know, just the biggest safe yet!" Hank said, pulling down the back hatch. Everyone gasped as they saw the haul, "Come on everyone, we're eating like kings tonight!" Hank exclaimed.

For the first time in weeks, everyone ate a full meal that consisted of more then just Emu meat. For once, no one had to eat Emu meat, but actual chicken and beef!

It almost reminded Hank of a BBQ, which made him feel a little bad, but he ignored those feelings. For once, everyone was happy. Even Kahn couldn't complain.

"Pass me a beer, redneck!" Kahn said.

Hank smiled and tossed him a beer, before cracking one open himself.

"Yep" He said.

"Yep" Bill said.

"Yep" Dale said.

"Mm hmm" Boomhauer said.

They all sipped there beer in front of Hank's house beside the dirt road. It was just like the past. The simple pleasures of life.

John Redcorn started a circle on Kahn's lawn. Minh , Kahn, and Nancy joined in, passing around a joint.

"Can I, Dad?" Joseph asked Dale.

"Yeah sure Son, you can do whatever you want!" Dale said. Joseph ran over and joined the circle. Hank glared at Dale.

"You can't just let Joseph do whatever he wants, there's got to be boundaries!" Hank said.

"Come on , Hank, Let them live a little" Dale said.

"Yeah man, yo, live and let live" Boomhauer said.

"No reason to make Life any worse" Bill said.

Hank sighed. He looked over and saw Bobby really close to him.

"Can I join in, Dad?" Bobby asked.

"No" Hank said.

"Please?" Bobby pleaded.

"No, son. There's just some things you don't do" Hank said. Bobby looked away disappointed, then sulked away into the house.

"Hank." Peggy said, glaring at him, "The boy's not getting any younger. Let him at least try, he would be with friends and trusted people!" Peggy said.

"No, I won't have my son doing that" Hank said firmly. Peggy tried to argue, then stopped. It was no use.

Conveniently, Connie and Joseph saw Bobbie sulking away. They nodded towards each other and snuck after him with a couple joints. Hank wouldn't even know.

"Oh Lucky, I love it!" Luanne squealed, holding the make up box. "Just for you, Baby girl" Lucky said, smiling.

Luannes eyes almost teared up from joy, she hugged Lucky, then whispered something in his ear. His eyes widened for a second, then he smiled, held her hand and took her back to their trailer. Hank uncomfortably looked away, then sipped some beer.

"Why don't we go play some music?" He asked his friends.

"Alright, let's do it!" Dale said.

"Yo man, I'll get my banjo" Boomhauer said, walking to his house.

"Grab the lawn chairs, we'll have a good old jam!" Hank said.

They gathered in a circle in front of Hank's house, and began a tune, a cover of Willie Nelsons "On the road again", Hank playing guitar, Boomhauer on Banjo, Bill playing the spoons and Dale on the washboard. His prized keyboard had been lost in the apocalypse, but he could cope.

They played late into the night around a couple lanterns, jamming and laughing at the stoned antics on Kahn's lawn, and for once in the post apocalyptic wasteland, life was good.

But it would not last.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

The next day began the same as before. The nuclear sunrise shone beams of light through the homes of New Arlen, awakening the community. Passed out on the grass was Bill Dauterive, who had got carried away with drinking from the night before. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and carried himself back to his shack to drink away a hangover.

Hanks lawn was a mess. There were knocked over lawn chairs and beer cans littered through out the small patches of yellow grass. Hank stepped outside, yawning, and then groaning at the state of his lawn.

"God dang it" He muttered under his breathe. Even after the apocalypse, the sight of his front lawn so desecrated still irritated him. He returned inside to grab a sharpened stick, and began picking up beer cans. Ladybird ran over to greet him.

"Hey girl" He said, patting her head with his free hand. She barked.

"That's right girl, got to keep the lawn clean" He said to her. She looked at him with slight confusion, then barked again.

"Hank, what are you doing?" Peggy called from the doorway, holding a cup of coffee in each hand.

"Cleaning up the yard, it's a mess" Hank said while folding up a knocked over lawn chair.

"Oh, come on Hank, relax a little before you go out scavenging" Peggy called out, "Come inside, I'm making bacon and eggs, real eggs! not emu" She returned inside.

"Five more minutes" Hank called after her, but he quickly gave up. It had been so long since he tasted bacon.

* * *

Bobby awoke with a start to the sound of knocking on his window. He instinctively grabbed a loaded handgun beside his bed and aimed at the window before seeing that it was just Connie.

"Connie! You nearly made me shoot you!" Bobby squealed.

"Jesus Bobby, watch where you're aiming that thing!" Connie snarled back, "Come on, get up, my mom's on watch today, we can just hang out."

Bobby lowered the hand gun, "My Dad will probably want me to do something" he said sullenly.

"Come on , Bobby, Your Dad's already left to go scavenging"

Bobby's eyes brightened, "He did?"

"Yeah, come on, get up!" Connie said.

Bobby lay back down in his cot, "Nah, I think I'll sleep a little more, sleeps always good" He yawned, closing his eyes.

"Bobby, come on, we can go party!" Joseph appeared at the window, holding a six pack.

Bobby instantly sat up, "Well why didn't you say so!, Give me two minutes!"

* * *

The best place to get drunk in New Arlen was behind Bill's Shack. There was a clearing that was hidden behind some dead bushes and an old tree, tucked away close beside the trench. The trio moved quickly down the street. Luanne was sitting on the front steps of her trailer, smoking a meth pipe. Lucky had left earlier with the rest of the men to go scavenging. She waved at Bobby as he walked by, an expression of emptiness on her face. Bobby looked away uncomfortably.

"Luanne's hitting the pipe again" Joseph whispered.

"You should really talk to her about it" Connie said.

"Hey, it's not my place to say" Bobby argued back.

"But its your cousin , Bobby" Connie pleaded, "It's not healthy"

"There's nothing healthy to do here" Bobby said.

"He's got you there" Joseph added.

"You guy's are pathetic" Connie said, but didn't say any more on the topic.

Everyone in New Arlen knew about Luanne's meth addiction, but no one wanted to step in. Lucky had picked up the chemists talents from his father. The inside of their trailer was basically a mattress and a meth lab. John Redcorns marijuana may have been enough to chill out most of New Arlen, but Luanne had the most trouble coping with the survivalists lifestyle, and needed stronger stuff to mellow out. The general consensus was that as long as she kept it to herself, the others would turn a blind eye.

When they reached Bill's shack, they saw he had passed out on his lawn, a bottle of Boomshine in his hand.

"I guess Bill didn't go scavenging today" Bobby noted.

"He went pretty hard last night" Joseph said, snickering. Connie and Bobby joined in, remembering Bill dancing like a buffoon the night before and throwing up on Kahn's lawn.

"Jesus, you should have heard him after everyone went to bed, he just kept farting all night on the lawn, I'm surprised he didn't shit himself!" Bobby said.

As if on cue, Bill let one rip, but did not wake up.

"Urgh! Nasty!" They all covered their noses.

"I can't believe he switched back to Boomshine after drinking Alamo, that's whats fucked him over right now" Joseph said, kicking away the empty bottle in Bill's hand, "That stuffs so nasty." Boomshine was the moonshine that Boomhauer made. He had a home made still in his house. Everyone agreed that it tasted like piss, but without Alamo beer, it was the only option. Bobby remembered watching Hank and the others drink in front of the house.

"My God, my boy's a failure and it's all because this dang urethra!" Hank shouted.

"Mm hm" Boomahuer agreed.

"It's not just your urethra's fault hes a failure, WINGO!" Dale shouted, pulling out a handgun and letting out several shots into the sky.

"Mm hm" Boomhauer repeated.

"You take that back Dale!" Hank shouted, swinging his fist at Dale. It knocked him to the ground.

"Hank's gone mad!" Dale shouted, throwing his bottle of Boomshine at Hank. Hank attempting to duck out of the way, but lost his balance and crashed forward into the dirt. The bottle smashed on Bill's chest.

"OW! FUCK!" Bill screamed. He took a swig of Boomshine, then tossed it aside and shouted "Stop fighting! At least you have a son! Both of you do, despite Dale's being a bastard and Hank gets to fuck Peggy and who cares about Bill's Urethra and... and ... and at least you got what you want, I just get the fucking scraps!" Tears were suddenly pouring down Bill's face as he fell to his knees hitting the side of Hank's house.

"Me hm" Boomhauer repeated again, still standing.

"Quit hitting my house!" Hank shouted, trying to get to his feet but falling over again.

"Well at least you don't have to worry about anything, Bill, no ones relying on you to stay alive and provide, you can just be dumb old smelly Bill and then die as a lonely dumb old smelly corpse!" Dale shouted at Bill, laughing.

"That's it , Dale, THATS THE LINE!" Bill charged Dale, his face exploding red with anger, but he merely tripped over his own feet, falling face first beside Dale.

"Mm hm" Boomhauer repeated a fourth time.

"Shut up, Boomhauer! Your Boomshine sucks!" Dale shouted. He shot his pistol at Boomhauer. The bullet shattered the bottle of Boomshine.

"WINGO!" Dale cheered. A moment later Boomhauer was on top of him, punching him in the ribs as many times as he could before Bill pushed him off to get a punch at Dale, but Hank managed to get to his feet and grab Bill from behind. The four friends broke out into a fight that lasted for two minutes and ended with several bruises and piles of vomit. From that day on, Bobby vowed to never drink Boomshine, and the four men decided on a strict drinking limit for Boomshine.

Bill farted on the lawn again.

"Come on, let's go get drunk" Bobby said. The three friends headed behind Bill's shack to the small clearing. Bobby cracked open the first beer before hearing a small, pitiful voice calling out from inside the trench, "God damn, help me!"


	7. Chapter 7

"Help me god dang it! I can hear you, help!" A wheezy male voice called out.

The trio of friends immediately tensed up. Bobby and Joseph both pulled out hunting knives.

"Whose there!?" Bobby shouted.

"God dang it, HELP ME!" The man pleaded.

Bobby and Joseph shared a look, then approached the trench slowly. The trench was roughly eight feet deep all around. Sitting at the bottom, nursing an injured leg was a sweaty white bald man wearing a dirty torn button up shirt and office pants. Beside him lay a suitcase. Buck Strickland had seen better days.

Bobby was surprised and taken aback for a moment, but then caught himself.

"Who are you? Are you infected?" He demanded.

"What?! No! Can't you see I need help! Who digs a goddamn trench in the middle of nowhere!" Buck shouted back.

"I don't trust him" Joseph said.

"It's Buck Strickland... he's my Dad's old boss" Bobby whispered to Joseph.

"We can't just leave him down there!" Connie pleaded. Joseph shook his head, "He's from the wasteland. Dad says only bad people wander out there!"

"John Red corn says a lot of things" Bobby said. Connie looked at him shocked, but Joseph didn't notice.

"We should wait for the convoy to get back, I don't care what John Redcorn says, my Dad will know what to do with him" Joseph argued.

"He'll die of exposure if we leave him, come on guys, we have to do something!" Connie said desperately. Bobby looked back and forth between Joseph and Connie.

"Come back boy! You gotta help me!" Buck Strickland cried out, "I think I sprained my ankle when I fell!"

Bobby ignored him, "Connie, go back to my place and get Peggy, she'll know what to do, we will stand watch" he ordered. Connie nodded, then ran off. Joseph had walked over to the trench to take a good look at Buck Strickland.

"Is that an Alamo beer? Come on boy, lend a man a drink! I'm dying of thirst!" Buck Strickland shouted. Joseph looked down at the sweaty man, and then at the beer.

"Dude, he's weak" He said to Bobby, before taking a sip of beer. Buck Strickland let out a desperate moan.

Bobby looked back down the trench.

"Don't worry , my mom will know what to do!"

"How do you know my name?" Buck Strickland said, squinting his eyes at Bobby. The sun was directly behind Bobby, making it impossible to distinguish Joseph and Bobby.

* * *

Peggy and Nancy sat on two lawn chairs in front of the Hill residence, enjoying a couple alamo beers and watching the neighborhood.

"It feels so good to finally have real supplies! I've been getting sick of having to work every single day" Peggy said, stretching.

"I kow how you feel Sug, For the first time I can finally just relax" Nancy replied absent mindedly.

"Oh, I know you've been taking breaks all the time, we all see you going over to John Redcorns trailer" Peggy said sternly.

"Oh that? That's nothing, A girl can have fun, can't she?" Nancy replied, giving Peggy a look.

"You know Dale or Joseph will figure this out sooner than later, right?" Peggy warned.

"I got away with it for ... about fifteen years now? I don't think they're going to find out anytime soon" Nancy said dismissively.

"Nancy, there's only fourteen of us left! IT's not the same anymore!" Peggy stated aggressively.

"Just relax Sug, don't get involved. I don't get involved about... you know, Luanne's habits..." Peggy looked away uncomfortably, "And besides, just look at him" Nancy gestured towards John Redcorns trailer. He was outdoors, topless, washing his clothing in a steel basin. Peggy couldn't help but look at his rippling muscles. A slight breeze flew over the wasteland, blowing his long black air in the wind.

"That's right Sug, I see you looking at him" Nancy said with a smirk, then let out a laugh. Peggy looked for another second, then joined in laughing.

"Well... he may have certain qualities about him... but I prefer Hank over John Redcorn any day. I like em old fashioned... and the other men here, don't get me started!" Peggy said, laughing.

"Hey, Dale can put on quite a show, as long as he doesn't start talking about capping some zombie in the middle of it. And Boomhauers been looking better then ever" Nancy said, sipping her beer, "I wouldn't really count any of the other men though." She nodded across the street, where Kahn was shouting at Minh in aggressive Laotian. They weren't quite sure what he was angry about, but he kept pointing at garbage on the lawn and then trying to wave Minh down. Minh ignored him, too busy watching from the perch. Eventually Kahn gave up trying to get her attention, proceeded to stomp in a circle on his lawn, then noticed Peggy and Nancy watching.

"What! You Rednecks never seen a domestic dispute get resolved! You always think every argument lead to fist fight, drunk on the lawn?! Pow Pow?!" He glared at them. Nancy waved.

"ARGH!" He shouted, then stomped off into his home and slammed the door.

"Kahn's not taking his new life well" Peggy noted.

"At least he doesn't.. .you know..." Nancy mimed smoking a meth pipe.

"There's a real winner. Sometimes I just wish I could shoot down that filth. He doesn't deserve Luanne!" Peggy growled. Her grip tightened around the empty beer can, crumbling it in her calloused hands.

"And then there's Bill. Did you hear him farting last night after he passed out?" Nancy asked, quickly changing the topic.

"Barely got any sleep, I have no idea how Hank can stand that man. Maybe I'm being too harsh, he did help build the house" Peggy said.

"He's also got that crush on you still" Nancy smirked. Peggy said nothing, but the twitching around her eyes revealed her disgust. She was about to say something when Connie came running up, shouting " ! ! Come quick! There's someone in the trench!"

Peggy and Nancy looked at each other, then jumped out of the lawn chairs and grabbed two nearby rifles leaning against the wall.

"Is he infected?" Peggy asked sternly.

Connie shook her head, "I don't think so."

Peggy nodded, "Take us to him."

* * *

Bobby and Joseph continued to watch Buck Strickland moan as they nursed two Alamo beers.

"Come on boys, give me a beer! Please! I'm dying out here!" He pleaded.

"Dude, maybe we should" Joseph said.

"We don't do anything until my mom gets here" Bobby said.

As if on cue, Connie returned, with Peggy and Nancy in tow.

"Alright, where is he?" Peggy asked.

Bobby pointed into the trench.

Peggy looked over, preparing for the worst, but was caught off guard by who she saw.

"Buck?... Buck Strickland?!" She gasped.

"Yeah... who are you? How do y'all know my name!" Buck demanded, trying to shield his eyes from the sunlight, "Is that... Peggy? Peggy Hill?! OH thank God, please help me up, where's Hank!?" He demanded.

"Not so fast" Peggy growled, "Have any zombies bit you? Are you infected?" She demanded.

"Do I look infected?! I've been wandering for days! I'm all out of food, and then I fall into a pit and break my leg in the middle of the night! I've been through hell and you're not helping!" Buck Strickland wheezed out.

Peggy narrowed her eyes, "Why were you out at night? How did you find this place?" She asked.

"I could hear people shouting and singing for miles! I saw the light in the distance, I've been wandering alone for so long! I've been calling for help all night, but no one heard me!" Buck Strickland pleaded, "Please help me , God dang it, I'm just a human being!"

"Come on Sug, help the poor man" Nancy said.

"Alright, Can you stand up?" Peggy asked.

"What do you think?! I broke my god dang leg!" Buck Strickland shouted.

Peggy sighed, pulled out a clip of ammo, then lowered one end of the rifle down to him, "Grab the rifle, don't even think about stealing it, or you're dead" She ordered.

Buck Strickland reached up and grabbed the end of the rifle. He gripped firmly while Peggy pulled him up. Once he was halfway over the edge, Bobby and Joseph joined in, hoisted him up into New Arlen.

"Woah , I didn't know you were that ... strong" Connie said with a look of surprise on her face.

"The end of the world can do that to a body" Peggy said proudly, stretching her arms out, "Connie, check his leg" She ordered.

Buck Strickland lay down on the ground while Connie inspected his leg.

"Does this hurt?" She asked , putting her arms on his ankle.

"Argh! Hell yeah!, It's broken, I told you, girlie!" Buck Strickland roared out.

"Don't talk to her that way" Bobby said, glaring at Buck. He seemed to shrink a little under Bobby's glare.

"Bobby, is that you?" He asked.

Bobby nodded his head, still glaring at him, "You forgot your briefcase" he growled.

"Forget about it, it's empty" Buck said quickly, "You look ... different" He said, with a slight hint of fear in his eyes. Bobby nodded.

"Alright, good news, you're ankles sprained, not broken. You'll be able to walk in no time" Connie said happily.

"Well alright, some good news for once. Now how about you get me a drink?" Buck asked, looking up at Peggy and Nancy. They looked back down at him with a look of disgust, "alright... maybe not. Can I at least have some shelter? Ive been out under the sun for days!"

Peggy nodded, "Joseph, Bobby, help to the house. He won't be running anywhere on that ankle."

Bobby and Joseph nodded, then helped up and took him away, Connie following.

"Do you really think he can do anything to help here?" Nancy asked as soon as they were out of earshot.

"No. And I've got a couple things to say to him before Hank gets back."

* * *

Buck Strickland sat in the living room of the Hill residence, drinking a glass of water. He sat on an old couch that had remained somehow intact after the apocalypse. Hank had found it scavenging, and it reminded him enough of his past life to take home. Bobby leaned against the wall, watching Buck.

The door opened as Peggy entered.

"Bobby, can you wait outside for a minute please?" She asked. Bobby left the room, leaving the two alone.

"So... whats on the menu tonight? You got real food here?" Buck asked.

"Shut your mouth. You don't belong here, and you might never belong here. You are weak, and you have always been weak, and you're lucky there were witnesses earlier, or I would have put a bullet in your head and dragged your corpse out into the wasteland to be eating by the dead."

Buck gulped.

"But I didn't, because I know how much Hank thinks of you. I don't know why he thinks you're the greatest thing to ever walk the earth, but to me, you are garbage and scum. And there's already enough scum here. If you try to treat my husband badly, or talk down to him in any way, or get him to do anything for you, even if he offers, you'll wake up tied up in the wasteland, and no one will find you" Peggy stared into his eyes.

He looked like he would piss himself.

"Do I make myself clear?" She growled.

He nodded his head.

"Say it out loud. Do I make myself clear?" She asked again.

"I understand... I'll be good" Buck Strickland wheezed out.

"Good" Peggy said sternly. Some commotion could be heard outside. The sounds of a truck, and cheers.

"Because Hank just got back, so you better not fuck up."


	8. Chapter 8

The red pick up truck rumbled to a stop in front of the Hill residence as the people of New Arlen gathered around. Hank climbed out of the drivers seat, smiling.

"Everybody, come and see this!" Hank shouted, beckoning everyone to the pick up, where Dale and Lucky were busy carrying off a large metal square shaped contraption.

"Hank? What's going on... is that a ?" Peggy asked, awestruck.

Hank nodded, "Yep, we found one, a propane fueled grill, in near perfect condition! We're having a barbecue tonight!"

The people cheered.

"Oh Hank! That's wonderful!" Peggy hugged her husband, who blushed, "Whoa Peggy, control yourself... there's people watching" He whispered, but no one was paying attention. The sight of a functional grill meant they were finally retaking the past, but best of all, it meant the return of the Hill's backyard barbecue parties.

"You done good, red... neighbor" Kahn said.

"Yo man, let's get it fired up. Grill grill" Boomhauer suggested.

Bill approached the commotion, finally awake. "What's all this... Hank? Is that a grill!?" He exclaimed.

Hank nodded, "We're eating good tonight, lets get this baby set up, Dale, find the little generator, lets get eating while the suns still up."

Dale nodded then jogged off to his van where most of the electrical supplies were stored. Hank began ordering everyone around so that the barbecue could go smoothly, but Peggy interrupted him, "Hey Hank. There's uh... someone inside who you should see"She said nervously.

"Someone inside? Who? You don't mean from ... the wasteland?" His expression changed to a more serious one.

"Yes... he's right inside" Peggy said.

Hank led the way to the house and opened the door...

"Mr. Strickland! Is that really you!" He exclaimed.

"Hell yeah, old top! I'm alive!" Buck exclaimed back.

Hank ran forward to shake his old bosses hand, trying to say as many greetings as possible, "Mr Strickland! We thought you were dead! The end of the world... and ... and the zombies! And the exposure! How did you survive?! Are you alright!? I'm so thrilled to meet you again, so thrilled you could make it!" Hank could barely contain himself, not allowing Peggy or Buck to get a word in edge wise. Ladybird ran past Peggy, pushing her out of the way to greet . She immediately picked up on Hank's excitement.

"It's so great you're here! You have no idea... Woah Ladybird, down girl, don't jump all over the man!" Hank let go off Buck's hand to pull Ladybird back, who was attempting to jump up on him and lick his face.

"Woah girl, calm down!" Buck said cheerfully, petting Ladybird's head, "Let me get a word in, Old Top! I've been wandering out there for days, trying to survive... dodging zombies and freaks and god dang gangs! There's gangs out there , Old Top!" Buck explained.

"Gangs? We've heard of a group, but haven't run into anything yet, did they get you?" Hank asked, still struggling to calm Ladybird down.

"Oh, they tried Old Top, but I got away from all of them, not an easy thing, they got guns, but I made it. And then last night i'm wandering around... see , night is the best time to travel because the freaks can't see you so good, and I see lights and hear singing in the distance, and I wander over to here and fall into a great pit!"

Hank looked shocked. Peggy was a little in shock too. This was the most emotion her husband had ever shown.

"A great pit? You mean the trench? Oh no! but you got out alright, right?" Hank asked with concern.

"OH yeah, Bobby and Peggy found me, and after a while-" Peggy gave him a glare "-I mean, they pulled me out as soon as they found me, even checked out my leg! I thought it was broken, but it was just a strain!" Buck said in a slightly forced cheery voice.

"Oh good! I mean, good it's not broken. Come on , we're having a Barbecue, and we scavenged a golf club set from the ruins, here let me help you up, you're the guest of honor!" Hank pulled Buck's arm around his shoulder and helped him outside, smiling the whole time. Buck chanced a quick look at Peggy, who scowled at him.

"Hank, we got the grill up and running and the foods all prepped, just need you give it the magic touch" Dale said as Hank stepped outside. Kahn and Dale's dining room tables had been pulled outside to make places to sit. With the supplies from the bunker, they're was more then enough to make at least two hamburgers per person.

"In a second, Dale" Hank said. He waved everyone's attention to him, "I would like to formally introduce everyone to our new guest of honor, Buck Strickland of Strickland propane, who found his way to New Arlen late last night, but was trapped in the trench until my family saved him!"

Everyone except Peggy.

"Now, let's get this barbecue started! Peggy, pass out the beers, Bobby, help to a seat." Peggy gave Hank a look, but he didn't see, he was too busy starting up the grill. The look on his face was priceless. Peggy didn't feel like ruining the moment. For once, she didn't have to cook.

For once, New Arlen was beginning to resemble just another day on Rainey street. So she cracked a beer, grabbed a burger, and joined in the party.

After the barbecue was done, Hank called all the men together.

"Check this out guys, I say we end the night with a Tee off" He said, with the golf club carrier strapped over his shoulder.

"Wingo! Let's do this!" Dale exclaimed.

Hank, Kahn , Bill, Dale , Boomhauer and Buck headed over to the edge of town.

"Hey, John Redcorn, you coming?" Hank asked, looking back. John Redcorn was sitting at one of the tables with Nancy, his hand hovering over hers.

He looked up at Hank, confused for a moment, "What? No, I do not golf, Hank, but thanks for the offer." His hair was caught in a slight breeze, dancing in the wind.

"Oh, alright... uh , carry on" Hank said, uncomfortably, putting his hand behind his neck. John Redcorn waved Hank away. Hank turned around and saw Lucky and Luanne heading back to the trailer.

"Hey, Lucky, you want to come golf? Tee Off at the edge of New Arlen!"

Lucky shook his head, "Nah, can't join in uncle Hank, got to cook up something of my own" He said, winking at Hank. Hank wasn't sure if this was sexual in nature or something else.

"Alright, well have-" "Lucky, lets go!" Luanne growled, interrupting Hank and tugging on Lucky's arm.

"Luanne, you alright?" Hank asked. She was looking skinnier and more unhealthy with each day.

"Yes uncle Hank! Everythings A-OK!" She stuttered back, before tugging on Lucky's arm again and pulling him away.

Hank watched them walk away until Dale called him, "Come on Hank! you got the clubs and we're all waiting!" The five men were lined up at trench, waiting impatiently.

"I'm coming!" Hank shouted, running over.

They lined up the golf balls and prepared to swing.

"Ten points if you can knock out a zombie!" Dale joked, even though the wasteland ahead of them was empty.

"Shut up , Dale" Hank laughed. The setting sun cast long shadows as the six men all swung.

* * *

Far off in the wasteland, Joe Jack wandered aimlessly, letting out low moans. His body was decaying rapidly, and he hungered for flesh. The darkness made it difficult to see anything alive, but also made it easy to find anyone sitting around a campfire. He let out a low gurgling moan as he stumbled, trying to catch a whiff of fresh meat, but there none to be found.

Then there was something. Something buried underneath the primal urge to feed, but somehow took priority. Like a voice, calling out in the darkness. It's message was one of good bounty, and it drew Joe Jack in it's direction. He let out a groan and headed towards it. The signal became more powerful with each step, as did the need to discover the source. With each step, the urge to feed was replaced by the urge to discover. Other's like Joe Jack could feel it's signal and hear the call, and were drawn too.

Joe Jack's consciousness and sense of awareness was too broken to react when another bumped into him, also heading towards the signal. Nothing mattered, as long as he reached the source, even if a dozen others surrounded and blocked his path. But it did not matter, they were all heading to the same place. A slow moving stampede, trampling across the barren waste, all towards one place.

Light could be seen in the darkness of night in the distance. A few small blips in the waste. Joe Jack and the others lurched towards it. The signal grew louder the closer they stumbled towards the lights. Whatever was calling to them was there. The stampede were like moths drawn to a candle, getting closer and closer. Joe Jack stepped on something small, hard and plastic, but he ignored it. They all ignored the small white golf ball in the dirt, as they drew closer to the lights and the signal.

* * *

Hank couldn't stop talking.

"Can you believe it, Peggy? Buck Strickland, the perfect American businessman, still alive! And he's here, sleeping in our very home!"

"I know Hank, it's great, but can you just let me go to sleep?!" Peggy grumbled, turning over in the bed so she wouldn't have to look at Hank.

"I know, I'm sorry... but I just can't sleep! I've never felt this excited! I mean, how often does this happen?" Hank asked.

"Urgh..." Peggy grumbled, trying to sleep.

Lady Bird whined outside the door.

"Can you get her to stop whining? She's been acting weird all night" Peggy said.

"No, she's just lonely, that's all, I'll let her in" Hank said, getting out of the bed. He opened the bedroom door and Lady Bird climbed onto the bed. Buck Strickland's snores could be heard from Bobby's room. Bobby was forced to sleep on the couch.

"Whose a good girl? Whose a good girl?" Hank said, petting Lady Bird before climbing back into bed.

"She don't smell right Hank, I think she's sick" Peggy said.

"She's not sick, Peggy, she's just getting old." Hank said, "Dog's act different when they get old, she was acting funny all day while we were out, it's just what they do."

Peggy groaned, trying to sleep.

"Alright, I'll let you sleep."

But Lady Bird continued to whine. And make other noises too. Weird growls.

"Hank, she's creeping me out, can't you take her outside?" Peggy asked.

"No, she's perfectly fine, she's just getting old" Hank said, trying to calm Peggy down.

Lady Bird started making more growling and gurgling noises.

"Hank, what the hell is wrong with her?" Peggy demanded.

"I don't know! I'm trying to calm her down!" Hank was attempting to pet Lady Bird, but she quickly snapped at him, "Girl! What's wrong?! Are you alright?!"

Lady Bird let out a low growl and started barking.

"Hank, Lady Bird didn't get..." Peggy asked cautiously, now fully awake.

"No... well... she may have bit a zombie.. .but she was saving someones life!" Hank pleaded, "-HANK!" Peggy jumped out of bed and reached for the shotgun. Lady Bird lunged after her but Hank grabbed her and held her down. She began barking furiously at Peggy, trying to break free of Hank's grasp.

"Don't shoot her!" Hank shouted.

"Get out of the way!" Peggy screamed.

"MOM! DAD!" Bobby screamed from the living room. His shout distracted Hank for a second, and Lady Bird jumped out of his grasp and charged straight at Peggy. She went straight for the neck, but her jaws only wrapped around the shotgun. She yanked it out of Peggy's hand, just as they both ran out the room, slamming the door shut behind.

"Jesus, Hank! She's infected!" Peggy shrieked at her husband. But Hank didn't hear her. He was busy staring at the front door, which was opened about three inches before the bolt blocked it, and several decomposing pairs of hands were trying to reach through, grasping for the Hill family.


	9. Chapter 9

END OF NEW ARLEN.

* * *

Joseph was lifting weights by candle light when he heard shouting from the Hill's residence.

"Probably nothing" He grunted to himself in the middle of a rep. He heard scratches on the front door.

"Whose there?" He asked. His heartbeat picked up rapidly. The only reply was more scratching and a low moan.

"Bobby? Is that you? Is this some kind of joke?" He grabbed a loaded pistol and slowly crept to the door. He reached out, his fingers touching the handle, before grasping it and pulling it open.

"ARGH! OH SHIT!" He jumped back as three zombies reached forward, just missing him.

"DAD! GET IN HERE!" Joseph screamed, opening fire at point blank range while retreating to the back end of the room. The master bedroom door burst open as Dale jumped out, two semi automatic pistols in hand, fingers pulling at the triggers.

"WINGO! Three dead zombies!" Dale exclaimed. He looked at Joseph's shocked expression, "Joseph, what's wrong? They're dead... wait" Dale paused for a second "... they're not suppose to be in here... oh no! Oh shit! NANCY!" He yelped for Nancy as a couple more zombies invaded the home.

* * *

"Lucky, come on, hurry up!" Luanne whined. She was sitting down on the mattress, watching Lucky prepare some more meth.

"Just a minute, hun, this stuff takes time" Lucky replied, his eyes focused on the jury rigged chemistry set.

"Do you hear something?" Luanne asked.

"That's just the beaker burning" Lucky replied, ignoring her, to focused on cooking meth.

"No... there's something outside, go check what it is!" Luanne demanded.

Lucky stopped and looked at her, "I think you're hearing things, I don't think you should smoke any candy tonight-" SMASH. The back window of the trailer broke open as zombie arms reached in, groping for prey.

"Oh shit!" Lucky stated, grabbing his shot gun.

* * *

"Kahn Junior, you listen to your mother! This is important stuff!" Kahn aggressively ordered his daughter.

"But Dad, there's no reason to study this, I want to sleep!" Connie argued back.

"Don't talk back to father, you need learn this stuff, important for future" Minh said.

Connie and Minh were sitting on the floor around a salvaged coffee table, studying an advanced arithmetic textbook, while Kahn leaned against the wall.

"Once world gets back to normal, and schools open again, my Kahn Junior will be first student to get into New Harvard!" Kahn said in an aggressive tone.

"Dad, I keep telling you, that's not going to happen! Not until after i'm dead... do you hear something?" Connie asked. Gunshots could be heard in the distance, and faint shouting.

"Who knows, maybe Bill drunk again" Kahn said, walking to look out the window. From the few lanterns set up up and down New Arlen, he could see lots of movement, especially near Bill's shack. There were too many bodies moving about, at least three times the population of New Arlen, and they were not moving in a natural manner.

"oh... shhh... grab the guns! NOW!" Kahn ordered to his family while reaching for an assault rifle he hung on a shelf. "Grab the car keys too!" He added.

* * *

Bill was drinking Boomshine all alone in his shack, sitting in the darkness. His eyes had long adjusted to the darkness, but his heart had never adjusted to the crushing loneliness and depression he always felt, especially when he was alone at night. It was nights like these that he contemplated ending it all.

His shack stank. Mold grew up and down the walls, on the ceiling and in the dirty crevices of his feet and the tips of his toes. No one in New Arlen ever came inside his shack. Empty beer cans and Boomshine bottles littered the dirt floor, along with most of his clothes and possessions. The only furniture in his shack was a plastic chair, a little plastic table holding a loaded handgun and a cot to sleep on.

Outdoors, he swore he could hear movement all around, but he was certain it was just the alcohol. He always heard movement outside his shack at this hour, when his only company was the bottle and the end of his pistol. Realistically, he knew that there was nothing outside his walls, but at time like this, he was sure the inner demons in his soul came out to harass him. To mock him and his failures.

Maybe this would be the night.

No one would miss him.

He put down the bottle and reached for the gun.

He picked up the pistol and pushed it up to his head.

A single tear slid down his face.

No more tears, just peace.

The door burst open as several zombies poured into the shack, arms outstretched to grab and devour Bill. The demons had truly come. His military and survival instincts kicked in, as he swung around and blasted the first zombie, painting the walls of his shack. The second one was mere inches away from Bill, the only thing keeping its jaw away was the end of the handgun.

He pulled the trigger , spreading out brain matter over top the mold of the shack.

The third zombie hit him from the side, it's teeth digging straight into Bill's shoulder.

"ARGH DAMN IT!" He screamed, unloading three bullets into it's skull. He pushed it off and got to his feet as two more zombies reached for him.

"I'M THE BILLDOZER!" He unloaded the clip into the pair, but four more followed them in. The space was getting tight. Bill tossed aside the pistol and grabbed two loaded automatic combat shotguns off the gun rack above his cot. While his back was turned, one of the more ambitious zombies bit straight into his ribs. He brought down his elbow on it, squeezing its head between his arm and side while spinning around to face the hoard. With one shotgun in each hand, he blew apart the zombies, decimating the walking corpses into chunks of meat.

He blasted his way out of his shack, only to find himself surrounded by at least thirty zombies on all sides.

* * *

"Everyone, into the den!" Hank shouted to Peggy and Bobby, who were both staring at the door that was barely holding back the undead.

"God Dangit! What the hell is all this!" Buck Strickland screamed from Bobby's room.

" !" Hank yanked open Bobby's door. The room was barely illuminated by one small candle. had retreated to the corner of the room, hugging his knees while staring at the barred window, where several zombies were reaching in.

" , come on!" Hank called out, extending his hand.

"Dad, grab the guns!" Bobby screamed. Hank grabbed two rifles from Bobby's gun rack and tossed them to Peggy and Bobby, just as the front door broke down. The home invaders made it about two feet before they were torn to shreds by gunfire.

"Grab all the guns!" Bobby shouted. Hank tossed out two more files, before taking a shotgun for himself and helping up .

"Everyone, into the den!" Hank ordered again. The Hill family retreated into the den, which had a ladder to the roof built in.

"Bobby, get up there!" Peggy ordered as she slammed the only entrance shut. Bobby nodded and quickly climbed up the ladder.

"How the hell am I suppose to get up there?!" cried out.

Hank looked at 's ankle, which was still twisted, then to Peggy, who was holding the door.

"Peggy, help get up the ladder, I'll hold the door, Bobby, take his hand!" Hank said, switching spots with Peggy. She gave him a "Are you fucking insane?" look, before helping up the ladder. The zombies reached the door and began pushing. Hank could feel it giving way. Bobby looked like he was having trouble pulling Buck up, until Buck used his own arms to get onto the roof.

"Peggy, get up there!" Hank ordered, just as the door gave way. He fell backwards as zombies fell into the room, groping and reaching for prey. Hank punched the nearest one in the face, knocking it backwards before reaching for the ladder. Peggy was already onto the roof as Hank scurried up. One ambitious zombie, who in his life before had been a skinny red haired social worker, grabbed Hank's foot and tried pulling him back down.

"They got me! Help!" Hank shouted, trying to kick the zombie loose, but the grip was like iron.

"I got him, Dad!" Bobby took the shot, decapitating the zombie social worker that had once tried to take Bobby away from his family with a high caliber round.

Hank shut the hatch to the den and took a moment to catch his breathe. He could hear shouting and gunfire all over New Arlen.

"How did this happen!? What the hell is going on?!" Peggy screamed, looking around.

Hank shook his head, "I don't know... we gotta get out of this though."

As if on cue, the Gribbles came running out of their home, Dale and Joseph in the lead with Nancy covering the rear, all armed.

"Dale! Get the Dead Bug Van!" Hank shouted from the roof.

Dale looked up at him, gave him a thumbs up, then opened fire on a handful of zombies heading his way.

"It looks like most of them are by shack!" Bobby said, pointing down to the opposite end of New Arlen. He was right.

While there was only a few dozen zombies around Hank's home, there was at least fifty or so crowded around Bill's Shack and Luanne's trailer.

"How did they get over the trench..? Oh shit..." Hank looked over at the part of the trench closest to his house. The light from the lantern hanging on the outhouse showed an uncountable mass of zombies just outside the trench line, while others simply walked over the trench. So many zombies had been drawn to the location that they had simply filled up several spots of the trench.

"Why did they all come here?!" Hank asked out loud.

Across the street, the Souphanoushinphones, with Kahn in the lead, ran out of their house towards their SUV. Kahn saw Hank on the roof.

"REDNECK! GET YOUR TRUCK!" He shouted, waving his gun in the air to attract Hank's attention.

"I've done a bad thing, oh lawdy" Buck Strickland said to himself quietly.

Peggy turned to him, while Bobby picked off zombies that drew to close to the gribbles or Connie.

"What did you say?" Peggy asked.

"It wasn't suppose to be like this, oh lord. They're suppose to help! This wasn't what was suppose to happen!"

"What did you do! Are you saying this is your fault!" Peggy shouted, aiming her hunting rifle right between Buck's eyes.

"Wah?! no... I mean... they said... they said there wouldn't be this many zombies, and they would come clear them out!" Buck said, as sweat started dripping down his forehead.

"What, who!?" Hank lowered Peggy's weapon while staring Buck Strickland straight in the eyes.

"This... group... they sent me here with a thing that attracts zombies... they said they would come in once the attack started.. but they're not here!" Buck was starting to get teary eyed as the realization set in that death was just around the corner.

"Who... what group?! Oh... no... no!" Hank looked away, remembering the man from in the ruins. He had mentioned someone coming in with a zombie tracker.

"What the hell did you bring! What's bringing them here!" Peggy demanded, prodding Buck with the rifle barrel.

Buck opened his mouth to reply, but Bobby cut in, "You left the suitcase in the trench! It was behind Bill's shack! You drew them here!" Bobby pointed his rifle at Buck too. Hank stepped in between his family and .

"Come on, calm down! We can't turn on each other now!"


	10. Chapter 10

Luanne and Lucky ran out of the trailer, gunning down zombies left and right, but they're were too many around them. A bottle of Boomshine flew through the air with a flaming rag attached to it. It burst on the ground and lit five zombies on fire, who immediately began to seizure up uncontrollably, there senses overwhelmed by the fire.

"Come on Luanne, over there!" Lucky shouted, grabbing her arm and pointing towards Boomhauer, who had climbed up on his rusted Camaro and was lighting off molotov Boomshine cocktails and tossing them into groups of zombies. Between Boomhauer and Lucky, Bill was forcing his way through the zombies in full Killdozer mode, blasting apart anything between himself and the camaro.

"It's got me!" Luanne screamed as one zombie grabbed her and tried pulling her away.

Lucky shot the zombie off her with his shotgun in his free hand. The kickback and recoiled sent it out of his hand and sprained his arm. He winced in pain, but the worst damage had not been done until a piece of the round that completely missed the zombie smashed through one of the trailer straight into the meth lab trailer.

* * *

"Hank, move aside!" Peggy growled.

"NO! This Isn't what we do!" Hank pleaded back.

"Move aside , Dad!" Bobby ordered.

"I won't allow you to hurt !" Hank pleaded.

For a split second, he thought he went blind as a bright light illuminated all of New Arlen, originating from Luanne's trailer, which quickly turned into a massive fireball. A second later, the shockwave hit, knocking Hank, Peggy and Bobby over.

Hank bumped into Bucked on his way down, who fell back a step too far right off the roof.

" !" Hank screamed, reaching out to Buck, but four zombies had already grabbed each of his limbs and were biting into his flesh.

"NO!" Hank cried out. He attempted to leap over the edge to fight them off, but Bobby grabbed him around the waist and pulled him back as Peggy looked down striaght into eyes, making direct contact with him as the undead chewed into his flesh, before putting a mercy bullet into his head.

"NO! !" Hank screamed ,pushing Bobby away and running to the edge, but he did not climb down. Buck Strickland was dead.

Hank looked from his old bosses corpse, to Peggy, and then back to the body.

"You... did it to save him" Hank said quietly.

Peggy shook her head without looking at him, picking off each zombie that feasted on Buck's corpse. "I did it to save you" She said.

* * *

The meth trailer explosion sent Luanne and Lucky flying through the air, along with several zombies who were not immediately incinerated. Through some strange stroke of luck, Lucky had been in front of Luanne when the fire wave clashed through them. He has quickly burnt to a crisp and shook apart, while Luanne was only partially burned. She hit the ground hard, and the first thing she saw was Lucky's corpse burning with the undead.

The shock wave knocked Bill straight into the side of the rusted camaro, and knocked Boomhauer clean off. Boomhauer climbed to his feet, and saw zombies already closing in around him. He picked up his shot gun and sprinted onto the top of the camaro.

"Help me up!" Bill coughed out. Boomhauer reached down and pulled him onto the camaro.

"Yo, this don't look good" Boomhauer said.

Bill nodded in agreement, "always knew it would come to this."

"Dang old apocalypse burning dead, yo man, this is fucked" Boomahuer said in agreement, as the undead surrounded the rusted camaro only to be blasted apart by shotgun rounds.

Over in the dirt, Luanne struggled to her feet, her entire body in pain. She ran her hand through her hair, and felt it fall off to her feet, completely burnt.

"NO!" She cried out, "LUCKY!"

She picked up his rifle and shot the nearest zombie.

"This is for Lucky!" The blast knocked the zombie into the air.

"This is for my trailer!" She spun around and send a slug through the nearest zombie, who may or may not have been a beauty school student.

"This is for every fuck up boyfriend!" She shot a zombie that was right to her left. Another one grabbed her from behind and bit into her neck, but she knocked it back with butt of her shotgun. blood was pouring out of her neck at an alarming rate.

"Oh no... Aunt Peggy! Uncle Hank! ...Help!" She moaned out as two more grabbed her , one ripping her throat open with its teeth while the other bit into the back of her head. She let out a gurgling sound as three more converged. Her legs gave out and she fell to the ground, her body disappearing under the hungry hoard.

* * *

Dale's Dead bug van and Kahn's SUV came to a stop at the trench, where Kahn and Nancy were attempting to lower the drawbridge, but the tension of the situation made it too difficult.

Minh, Joseph , Dale and Connie were covering them, blasting away the zombies that got close.

Hank looked over at them.

"We have to get the truck over, Nancy and Kahn have no idea how to lower the drawbridge" Hank said, "Peggy, take the truck keys and get over to them, Bobby, stay with your mom and cover them" He ordered.

"But Dad!" Bobby objected, "No, We're getting out of here. I'm going to try to get to Boomhauer and Bill before its too late, once they get out of there, that whole horde will be coming this way" Hank pointed over to Boomhauer and Bill, who were holding off on top of the camaro, but were completely surrounded.

"Hank, that's crazy! They're not going to make it!" Peggy pleaded.

"Don't worry, I have a special tool for this situation, just get the truck ready!" Hank ordered, "I know you can handle this." He stared at Bobby straight in the eyes. Bobby looked scared for a moment, then nodded.

Hank turned around, ran to the backside of the house, and jumped down. Two zombies stretched out for him, but he ignored them and kicked open the back door. Outside, he could hear the truck engine come on. "Good" He thought out loud to himself. He opened up a special cabinet he made in the kitchen, and pulled out a propane tank with a back trap attached for a hose like nozzle. He flipped a switch on the nozzle just as a trio of zombies marched into the kitchen, and squeezed the trigger. Propane fueled flames spat from the end of the nozzle and torched the three zombies, overwhelming their cognitive abilities and burning them away. They seemed to seizure up in a confused manner, giving Hank enough time to get back outside.

A lot of the zombies around Bill's shack had noticed all the commotion at the other end of the street, and were headed in a slow stampede towards the three vehicles. Peggy had parked the truck beside the other dead bug van and SUV, and was sniping zombies with Bobby in the pickup. Hank sprinted towards them, waved at them to cover him, then headed towards the stampede to save his friends, torching the four nearest zombies.

He looked to his left to see a powerful sight. John Redcorn was running alongside him into the crowd, to help fight to Boomhauer and Bill. He nodded at Hank, his hair blowing in the sudden wind. In one hand, he carried a large woodcutting axe, while in the other he threw a tomahawk straight into a zombie dressed like a lawyer. It cut straight through the skull and downed the zombie lawyer. John Redcorn pulled a large revolver out of his belt and began blasting and hacking away zombies as Hank burned them down.

Minh was out of ammo. She tossed her rifle into the SUV and looked at her husband, who still could not lower the drawbridge.

"Kahn! Go help neighbor fight undead! I'll get the bridge lowered!" She ordered.

Kahn looked at her, confused, "huh?" he asked as she pushed a sub machine gun into his arms.

"Go, help Hank!" She ordered.

* * *

"Yo, man, watch it! Too many!" Boomhauer shouted. For each zombie he gunned down, two more would take its place. They were within two feet of the camaro.

"No man, no ammo!" Boomhauer screamed. He threw his empty rifle into the crowd and pulled out a pistol, as one zombie grabbed Bill's leg.

"Oh no you don't!" Bill shouted, kicking the zombie in the face, but several more grabbed his leg and bite into it.

"ARGH!" Bill screamed ,falling forward into the sea of undead.

"No man! God dang it, NO! BILL!" Boomahuer screamed, reaching for Bill but it was too late.

All Bill could do was twist himself around so he was looking towards Boomhauer as hundreds of cold fingers ripped open his shirt.

Boomhauer stared in horror as his longtime friend's gut was ripped open in seconds and dozens of undead hands dug in and yanked out organs and intestines. Bill screamed in the most primal animalistic wayas he saw his intestines and innards pulled out of him.

"No man! No hope!" Boomhauer screamed, tears pouring down his face. In one motion, he pulled out his last bottle of Boomshine and his lighter, and smashed the molotov Boomshine on the camaro, lighting himself ablaze as zombies pulled him down to his death.

* * *

Hank saw the explosion of flames , along with Boomhauer being pulled into the horde and Bill's innards being flung through the air.

"NO!" He shouted, spraying flames at the wall of zombies ahead of him.

"NO NO NO NO NO!" Bit's of the walking corpses popped under the heat of the propane flamethrower.

John Redcorn saw the blaze and looked away, shedding a single tear of remorse , before hacking off a zombies head with the axe.

Hank couldn't accept that his friends were dead. He tried to press on.

"HANK! NO! They're gone, do not lose yourself in the spirit of battle!" John Redcorn shouted, grabbing Hank and pulling him back, "We must get to the cars, we have to escape!" He let go off Hank and pointed towards the drawbridge, which had just been lowered. The dead bug van was already driving away, while Minh and Connie hopped into the SUV.

"Come on Hank, lets go!" Peggy screamed.

"Alright, give me one second" Hank said. He pulled off the propane flamethrower and twisted open the nozzle on the propane tank, then ran for it. A zombie had gotten too close though, and wrapped its arm around him. Hank fell to the ground. He could smell the monsters breathe right on his neck. John Redcorn had not seen him fall, and was running back to the truck.

Before the undead could bite into Hank, machine gun fire pushed it off. Hank looked up to see Kahn extending a hand to him.

"Come on Neighbor, time to go!" He shouted. Hank grabbed his hand and pulled himself up. They sprinted back to the truck. They passed John Redcorn, who had knocked a zombie to its knees. He lifted the axe above his head and brought it down into the skull. The axe lodged itself in, and would not come out.

John Redcorn pulled hard on it, even putting one leg onto the zombies shoulder to give himself support, but it would not budge.

"Damn it, come on!" He growled under his breathe, pulling hard on the axe. Three zombie drew in around him. He shrugged, pulled out his revolver with his free hand and shot.

Bang.

Bang.

Click.

Two fell dead, one kept coming.

Click, click. Out of ammo.

"$No!" John Redcorn whispered as his eyes widened. He let go off the axe and made a run, just as the zombie leaped for him. It grabbed him by the end of his long flowing black hair.

"NO!" John Redcorn screamed, pulling out his hunting knife and attempting to quickly cut his hair, but the zombie pulled him in close and bit straight into the side of his Redcorn screamed in pain, stabbing the zombies face and body, but could not push it off. A second one joined in.

"Dad! Look!" Bobby screamed from the passenger window, pointing at John Redcorn just as Hank and Kahn jumped into the back pick up.

They both turned at the same time, and both of their expressions changed to horror as they saw John Redcorn's face being torn apart.

Kahn aimed the machine gun, to put John Redcorn out of his misery, when something ignited the propane flamethrower, creating an explosive firestorm that engulfed John Redcorns body and a majority of the horde.

Peggy kicked hard on the accelerator as the truck sped out of New Arlen after the Dead bug Van and SUV, plowing through the undead.

"I can't believe it... we lost it" Hank said, staring back at the burning wreckage of New Arlen, just as the sun began to rise.

"We were so close... neighbor" Kahn said.

They watched as the burning ruin drew further and further away, as the beams of sunlight showed the black sea of undead that were being drawn to the wreckage.

In a few minutes, they passed through the zombies into open fields.

"Where do we go now?" Kahn asked.

Hank shook his head, "I don't know... the supply bunker, I guess."

"Hank, we got company!" Peggy shouted from the driver seat.

Hank and Kahn both looked ahead.

A small convoy of black vehicles was rapidly catching up to Dale's Dead bug Van and Kahn's SUV. And they didn't look friendly.


End file.
